It’s the most wonderful time of the year but for many of us it comes with a sense of dread.
*Enter holiday family gatherings.*
You are practicing intuitive eating, food freedom, and your body may have changed. You probably have not seen family members in over a year and now it’s time to see them again.
And you have of course that one family member, the judgemental one or two who will indeed, comment on your body and food choices:
“You gained weight.”
“You are going to really eat that?”
“You HAVE to finish your plate, I made it especially for this occasion.”
And so on.
I have definitely encountered this and heck, just because I am an Intuitive Eating Coach does not mean I am immune to these comments.
So here are some tips that may help:
-You can respond back with the weight gain comment with “You haven’t seen me in over a year and this is the first thing you say to me?”
-You can choose to change the subject.
-The good ol’ “ignore them” always works.
-You can respond with “my body is not for discussion” if it feels comfortable for you to say.
-If the body/diet talk continues, I would get up and excuse yourself and say “be right back, need to use the restroom” and avoid that person if you can. You are not obligated to connect with someone that will body shame you or talk about dieting non-stop just because they are related to you.
-As far as having a relative push you to join the “clean plate club” I would politely say “no thank you, I stop when I am full, but the food was great.”
-Remind yourself to give compassion to these people. They are also entrenched deeply in diet culture, and don’t know any better. These people’s minds will not be changed in a split second, you and I both know this takes months and even years to unpack the diet culture messages out there. Just keep telling yourself “yea diet culture is still out there, and these people still hold these beliefs that being in a smaller body is better for you and that diets work, when in reality they don’t.” Or anything that involves practicing compassion towards people who are in the toxic diet culture cycle.
Hope these tips help! Which response(s) will you use on your next holiday gathering? Let me know in the comments below or send me an email at deanna@deannakozarov.com. I would love to know!
And if you would like to be coached 1:1 during the holidays, this is the best time to do so and get additional support. Apply and I will see if we are a good fit for my 1:1 Coaching program. Apply here the following link: Apply for 1:1 Coaching.
Here’s to a peaceful relationship with food and body during the holidays,
-Deanna
Deanna Kozarov LLC 